funny quotes about real life

Short Funny Quotes About Life Life is like homemade ice cream: sweet and seasonal. Enjoy it before it melts. Pets: the family members you get to choose. There's no need to turn on the …People don’t have to like you, and you don’t have to care.”. 21. “Just tell me when and where and I’ll be there 20 minutes late.”. 22. “I will text you 50 times in a row and feel no shame. You’re …Style. That’s what people remember.” – by Terry Pratchett. “Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.” – by Robert Benchley. “If at first you don’t …22/11/2013 · 5. Oliver Herford: A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s: She changes it more often. 6. George Bernard Shaw: A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend …Here we share the best funny life quotes about life and sayings. “You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live. Now.” — Joan …Not everyone has good taste.”. “2. The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets”. “3. I really do try to see the best in people. But seriously.. Some of you fuckers are …04/10/2018 · 14. An accurate analogy. "Life is soup and I'm a fork." — unknown. 15. Perfect for a Christmas or holiday-themed Instagram selfie caption. "If you were able to believe in Santa …

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funny quotes about real life